‘‘Twas the Night Before Kentucky

'Twas the night before football, when all throughout Lexington,

Not a creature was stirring, except for some students dealing heroin

The end zones were painted with Kentucky white and blue,

while John Calipari insisted “we are a basketball school.”

Mark Stoops was awake and punching the air with his fist,

Knowing he’d never top basketball on Big Blue Nation’s list

Will Levis was up reading the latest mock draft,

as Chris Rodriguez drove home after 5 beers and a laugh

Fans of both teams were home resting their voice,

As UK degenerates lamented the -21.5 choice

Uptown Oxford was alive this time of night,

while all the frats consumed some more Natty Lite

Sean McVay and John Harbaugh were counting down the hours,

And in Pittsburgh Big Ben downed another whiskey sour

As for me, I was awake, hiding in the stadium called SEC,

Waiting patiently for the game as the stars shined brightly

When all of a sudden on the field, there arose some commotion,

I did not see who it was, but I heard what he had spoken:

"Go Brett! Go Collier! Go Rusty and Schaffer!

On Salopek! On Ty Wise! On Jalen Walker!"

More rapid than lightning, the players they came,

And this person whistled, shouted, and called them by name:

"Now Tyre! Now Vaughn! Now Ertl, and Jack!

"On McWood! On Warren! On Mozee and Mac!

"We’re faster and stronger than ever before!

“Let’s win this damn game and let’s run up the score!”

One by one the players ran out, they looked as if they could fly,

As this Friday was alive under a beautiful night sky

Coldiron, Bestor, Saunders they flew,

Coach Koehler, Coach Brechin, Coach Conrad too

And all of a sudden, I saw who was leading the charge,

It was a man that ran out, with a personality so large

I looked a little closer and listened in on his cries,

That man was Chuck Martin, with a fire in his eyes

He was dressed ready to coach in his red Miami vest,

When I heard him yell out, “Champions don’t rest!”

The players and coaches all huddled up in a pack,

“When you take this field tomorrow, you have each other’s back!”

His hands were waving, his face red as a cherry,

“We’ve worked hard for this moment, I know we are ready”

Then the players started singing, it started out very low;

It was hard to make out, under the moonlight glow,

All of a sudden it got louder, and the players roared like thunder,

The song they were singing was our school’s alma mater:

"Love and Honor to Miami, our college old and grand.

Proudly we shall ever hail thee, over all the land.

Alma mater now we praise thee, sing joyfully this lay,

Love and Honor to Miami for forever and a day."

As the song ended, the coaches and players huddled up real close,

Coach Martin looked over them, about 90 of them I suppose

He stared over them, and said "tomorrow we will do our best,

If we accomplish the little things, we wont have to worry about the rest

Lets hit first, defend the pass, and make sure that we block,

Let’s show the nation that Miami football is back, tomorrow at 7 o clock"

The players nodded their heads, they knew they were tough to beat,

As they got up and walked back to their locker room retreat,

But I heard Coach Martin exclaim before he too was a goner,

“Happy Football Season to all, and to all Love and Honor.”


Very Well Done.!

Well he’s no idiot!


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